Does E.Q. really exist like I.Q.? Is it a concept to appease unintelligent people who usually think, "My I.Q. score is low, but my E.Q. score isn’t.”?
Welcome back to the weekly updated Essential Life Skills album, Fountains!
Today, we will be focusing on E.Q., which stands for Emotional Intelligence (or) Emotional Quotient.
Techniques to assess human I.Q. were widespread during the late 1900s and early 2000s, whereas the term Emotional Intelligence / Emotional Quotient (E.Q.) became popular only after 1990.
Although Intelligence Quotient (I.Q.) can be scientifically assessed through various tests, E.Q. cannot be measured easily in these ways since it is rooted in emotions. Then it has become a controversy over whether it actually exists or not.
In actual fact, Emotional Intelligence is the ability to understand the emotions of you and those of people around you to respond in the most appropriate way. Regardless of whether there is an indication to accurately evaluate Emotional Intelligence, you can see the truth that serene and sociable individuals are obviously distinctive from the ones who usually get irritated or somber easily, lacking empathy and selflessness, in your surroundings.
Simply put, Emotional Intelligence can be defined as maturity. So how do we define E.I.? Which is more important, maturity or high I.Q., within the workplace and educational fields? What should we do to be mature? These are the questions going to be presented today. Please tap each photo to read the full content.
Translation by @Hiton
Graphics by @Glory
" What is Emotional Intelligence? "
Dr. Daniel Goleman, who popularized the term ‘Emotional Intelligence’ among people defined that, “E.I. is the ability to recognize our emotions and those of others, to manage those emotions, and to express our emotions in the most suitable way.” People with high E.Q. can handle various situations wisely and serenely in their day-to-day lives.
E.I. consists of four main parts.
Self-awareness
Precise understanding along with embracing what your emotions are and, why you are experiencing them is called Self-awareness. It can be assumed that you know the essence of your mindset.
Self-management
This refers to the capacity to deal well with your feelings of grief, lamentation, and stress. One of the brain components, the Amygdala, is primarily associated with emotions. When we undergo an intense emotion, the Amygdala keeps us concentrated on that one, leading us not to be aware of anything around us. For instance, when you are about to enter the examination room and suddenly notice that you have forgotten your student card, stress grips you, and then you become unconscious of any actions of fellow students nearby. Considering the same situation, self-awareness, likewise, means the ability to approach problems calmly, thinking ‘What should I do?’, without getting nervous or repentant.
Social Awareness (Empathy to others)
Have you ever been scolded for no apparent reason when asking something to your mother while she was busy? If so, you still lack Social Awareness.
Social Awareness is the deep understanding of others' emotions, and the capability to discern when and how to treat someone else appropriately. This is when you try to understand others by showing your empathy together with guessing what their feelings or perspectives might be. The only thing that can avert your busy mother from jumping into the subsequent negative emotion, ‘anger’, is Social Awareness.
Relationship Management
People say “A mere 10% of a problem is due to different opinions, and 90% of it is due to the tone.”.
Our actions, to some extent, are influenced by our emotions. The last part of E.I., Relationship Management, is the attempt to adjust your emotions with those of others to achieve your desired outcomes. It is such an essential skill for leaders. When it comes to disagreement, the ability to find an answer favorable by both sides, to resolve issues without causing any harm to either side, etc. are parts of Relationship Management.
"Which holds greater importance, E.Q. or I.Q.?"
In 1921, psychology professor Lewis Terman of Stanford University started an experiment that involved recording the development of a total of 1,500 children with an I.Q. of 150 or above across the nation, till they grew up. His aim was to prove the key to success is the I.Q., and he anticipated that those children would surely become Nobel prize winners, exceptional artists, and professors when they reach adulthood.
Only a modest 20-25% of the children in his experiment met his expectations; they evolved into highly successful citizens. Most of the rest pursued careers in medicine, engineering, and numerous other fields, yet none of them achieved greater success or fame compared to individuals with lower I.Q. scores. They just carried on living their normal lives.
According to the experiment, possessing a high I.Q. and achieving success are not directly proportional although they can sometimes be related to each other.
In the context of defining success, particularly in relation to mastering critical thinking, the perspective put forth by Manlaeh Sayadaw asserts that true achievement encompasses more than mere intelligence. It involves the fusion of intellect, compassion, and the ability to adapt to circumstances regardless of their magnitude or complexity. This viewpoint emphasizes that the journey towards triumph requires not only intellectual acumen but also a compassionate and benevolent disposition – a 'delicate heart'. In this holistic approach, challenges find resolution through the harmonious synergy of cognitive prowess and empathetic virtues.
"Is it possible to cultivate a high E.Q.?"
Emotional Intelligence can be an inherent trait or a skill that can be practised. If you often struggle to handle your emotions, find yourself being overwhelmed by them, or feel a sense of lack of emotional maturity, we recommend adhering to the guidelines below.
1. Practise Mindfulness and Self-reflection
Please be mindful of all your actions.
If you eat something, feel the texture, smell, taste, etc. mindfully. Practise the same when you work regardless of its simplicity or size.
Observe and reflect on yourself.
It does not imply gazing at your reflection in a lake till death, reminiscing about all your positive attitudes like Narcissus. It just means to contemplate about experience, thoughts, words you said, and the way you responded. To pursue self-reflection, you can start with activities such as meditation or writing a diary.
2. Sincere interest in others
“You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” - This is an excerpt from a self-help book, ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People’ by Dale Carnegie.
Having interests in others does not equate to being nosey. This guideline refers to engaging in active listening to others when they come to you for advice or unburdening their issues or emotions, asking them empathetic questions that convey their lives, experiences, and emotions, enjoying their happiness along with them, etc.
3. Meditation
Meditation is linked to none of the religions. The intention to meditate is to observe your thoughts and gain insight into your own mindset, to reduce stress, depression, and anxiety, to enhance concentration, and to eliminate toxic thoughts. This habit should be pursued since it can yield numerous benefits for both physical and mental well-being.
4. Emotional Regulation
You are in charge of your own emotions. Never let your emotions dominate you. However, it is important to comprehend emotional regulation really well. Emotional Regulation skills are necessary to effectively deal with grief and tension. Detailed information is here.
5. Expose yourself to others’ perspectives
You should be willing to deeply consider why you perceive ‘6’ while others perceive ‘9’, in an opposite way, letting go of a mindset where all your beliefs are unquestionably true. Explore different points of view from diverse angles, and keep in mind that no one remains constant.
"How do people with high E.Q. typically behave?"
Certain characteristics of emotionally intelligent individuals include
Addressing problems in a calm and logical way when they face them
Ability to focus on a present process without the expectation of achieving flawless outcomes
Treating both the young and the elderly with compassion
Ability to discern or care about not only others’ words but also their gestures and facial expressions
Optimism
Willingness to accept reasonable criticism
Possessing constructive relationships
Adapting to changes without fear or hesitation
Ability to satisfactorily resolve issues from both perspectives of each side in the name of disagreement.
Having clear objectives and strong desires to make their dreams come true
Dealing with failure with composure and taking lessons from their encounters
Supporting people around them to succeed rather than exerting control over others
Ability to understand and mindfully control their behaviors stemming from their emotions
Ability to discover alternative ways to confront challenges with perseverance
Living in the present moment, with the attitude of being grateful for everything they have
Now we hope that you all have a substantial understanding of Emotional Intelligence. We, Study Diary, will be sharing Essential Life Skills and diverse knowledge of different fields, and feel free to leave comments if you have any questions or concerns.
Stay tuned, everyone!
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